Archana Puran Singh and Parmeet Sethi got married in 1992. (Photo: Archana Puran Singh/Instagram)
Archana Puran Singh and Parmeet Sethi secretly tied the knot in 1992 and welcomed their older son Aaryamann in 1994 but for the first few years, their journey into parenthood was extremely rocky as Parmeet was completely “absent” and Archana “felt alone”. In a new vlog shared on her YouTube channel, Parmeet said that he had no idea that his life would change completely after welcoming a child. As soon as Parmeet said so, Archana questioned, “How did your life change? Because for the first few years you were absent.”
Parmeet Sethi was a ‘very bad father’
Parmeet admitted that he was a “very bad father” and was “absent” for the first few years of Aaryamann’s life. He confessed that until they had their second child, Ayushmaan, Parmeet would meet Aaryamann in “guest appearance.” He also mentioned that both their pregnancies were unplanned but Archana shared that she indeed wanted a second child. She also recalled that she had her first child at 36, and the second child at 39, which was “very old for a mother”.
Parmeet said that he stepped up after Archana got pregnant a second time and he witnessed that the attention that was being showered upon Aaryamann was decreasing, and would presumably decrease after the birth of the second baby. “I saw Aaryamann realising that the conversation had shifted from him to someone else. That’s when I realised that he will not get as much attention, and I decided that I will take him under my wing. That’s when I started spending time with him, playing with him. I became his father in the true sense,” Parmeet shared.
Archana Puran Singh wondered why Parmeet Sethi wasn’t sharing the load
Archana then reminded Parmeet that just like how he was quite oblivious to what a woman goes through during her pregnancy, he was also quite unaware of the needs of a new mother. “Just like you were not aware of what I was going through during my pregnancy, you didn’t pay attention to what a woman goes through after the baby. I was so weak during that time and you were missing,” she said and recalled that she would wake up at least six times during the night to check on the baby and feed him. “I thought, why isn’t Bittu (Parmeet) sharing my load? Then you convinced me, ‘What can I do? I can’t feed the baby,” she shared.
Parmeet instantly confessed, “I didn’t help you. At least for the first 3 years of Aaryamann’s life, I didn’t help you at all. I just changed his nappy a couple of times, I am admitting it.” He also admitted that he had no idea about post-partum and to this, Archana said that even she did not know much about it and didn’t know if she was going through it. “But I felt I was alone. I was powering through everything but I was so fragile then,” she said.
Archana Puran Singh and Parmeet Sethi recall early days of parenthood. (Photo: Express Archive)
Parmeet Sethi says Archana Puran Singh ignored wifehood duties after kids
Archana also recalled that Parmeet once got extremely annoyed when she refused to go out for dinner as she was so tired looking after the kids. “I remember it was our anniversary and I was putting the children to bed. They were 3-4-5 then. And I was ready to go but I was so sleep deprived because I would feed them, get their homework done, and take care of them. You said the table was reserved and you were so angry with me,” she remembered.
Parmeet recalled that during this phase, Archana would simply refuse to go out with him. “I understand that you wanted to be with the kids but does the husband also exist or not?” he asked and added that this was a “balancing act and you didn’t balance it, and that’s a fact.” He added that this is when they started having a lot of problems. “It was a very touch and go situation between us,” he said.
‘You didn’t understand what a mother has to do’
As he pointed this out, Archana asked why Parmeet did not understand the position that she was in at this point as she was juggling so many things at the same time. “You yourself said that you didn’t know what fatherhood was so you obviously did not know what motherhood was. You didn’t know what all a mother has to do,” she said, as Parmeet asked, “What about wifehood? You didn’t understand wifehood.”
Archana stuck with her stance and said that while she understood Parmeet must have been hurt but for her, being a mother was a bigger responsibility at that time.
Curated by Aisha Patel
